As an extention to my post two weeks ago about Montaigne I would like to discuss your vision. This will be a personal development kind of post, about where you are looking. Keep reading and you might actually learn something about yourself! And there is a neat little video at the end!
At what are you looking?
If you are thinking about the thoughts you had today. Where were they about? About the next holiday? The weekend you are going to spend with your friends? Alright, this means you have a look in the future. You are thinking about the future instead of the present! That is a discussion about ‘being present’, I don’t want to talk about that.
Where I want to talk about is your search for causes. If you are a little bit curious, you will always try to find the ‘why’. As a little kid we already did this (‘Mum, why is Kitty eating that mouse?’). And as adults (or sort of adults) we are still asking why all the time! Why is somebody acting the way he does? Why is something happening the way it does? The only difference is that we don’t want to hear the answer anymore. We aren’t completely sincere with our curiosity.
Most often, when I hear somebody speak those 3+ words out (‘Why is ..’) I hear a retorical question. ‘Why is Paul leaving me?’ ‘Why is this happening to me?’ ‘Why is my curriculum so extremely stupid?’
We don’t want an answer to those questions. At least, not the true answer. We want answers like ‘All guys are assholes’, ‘This is just faith’ or ‘Because the curriculum is made by stupids’. We never want to hear the real answer, because that is just too hard to handle.
Because the true answer lies most of the time within yourself. Paul left you because you are never returning his phonecalls. This is happening to you because you didn’t pay attention and the curriculum isn’t stupid, you are just not smart enough to understand the concept.
We really don’t want to hear the answer, because the answer is not the reason we are asking these questions. We want sympathy/empathy, we don’t want real answers.
Listen to the true answers
But what if we are going to listen to the true answers? We might at well learn something from it. What if we stopped our eager for sympathy/empathy and looked inside for answers. As discussed in the post about Montaigne, one of his greatest ideas is to look inside instead looking to external factors on what happens in our life.
Look within yourself – look for internal factors
What is happening to you lies outside of your reach, at least, according to the public opinion. But the most things we are frustrated about lies within our reach. If you really are that set up with Paul leaving you, why did you do the things that made him leave you? Why didn’t you return his calls? Maybe you aren’t that into him at all, maybe something within you don’t want to be with Paul.
If you look at what is happening to you, there is a lot you cause yourself actually. You are creating the opportunities you get yourself! What is happening to you doesn’t lie outside of your reach, if you look deeply within, you’ll understand.
And the curriculum, if you are really that set up with that, why are you doing this major? Or why are you at this University? If you are that set up, why don’t you change majors/universities? And if you don’t want to do that, maybe you should just stop whining. Stop whining and bothering people around you.
I am going to try to embed videos more, so here is one about this post!
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